We Never Call Bendis "God". (brianbendis) wrote,
We Never Call Bendis "God".
brianbendis

Bendis Board Bits

We thought it'd be amusing to share some memorable dialogue from the Bendis Board. Cut and Paste Crusader, hit it!

Ford Dumps Flockhart – In Garbage Can
BENDIS!:
Hollywood legend Harrison Ford stunned onlookers in the Spanish city of Barcelona when he attempted to dump his girlfriend Calista Flockhart in a waste disposal bin. Indiana Jones star Ford and his Ally McBeal actress lover engaged in the high jinx as they made their way back to their hotel, following dinner at a restaurant in the city, where Flockhart is filming upcoming movie Fragile. An onlooker, who witnessed 62-year-old Ford's bizarre stunt, says, "They were laughing and joking like a young couple in love. She was squealing and begging him to put her down, but he kept saying he was going to put her in the bin. Harrison was showing off like a crazy teenager rather than a guy approaching his pension."
bloodyhell: Why do people try and top Michael Jackson? It CAN'T be done!!!

kubiak: A stunned onlooker said, "I saw a Grandfather try to put his 12 year old Grandson in a trashcan! It was weird. Then they toungue kissed."
A Question About God and Jesus.
www.ssscomics.com: So am I to assume that Jesus didn't want the religious couple to with the Amazing Race? They were pretty sure the lord was on their side.

bartleby: I had hoped the question was going to be "who would win in a fight?"

ourchair: Actually, I tend to see this as a very comicky conflict. I mean, we're talking about two individual manifestations of what is essentially the same evidence, going toe to toe in a brutal no holds barred match for the balance of Heaven itself.

It's like Jesus is fighting His divine twin only the divine twin is in His pure form. To illustrate, imagine if a Final Fantasy villain had to fight his Pure Form, which is usually an angel-winged creature being supported by operatic chorus and pipe organ music. That's what Jesus vs. God is like.

And for the record, it should be drawn by Erik Larsen.

Kirby's corpse: Think of it this way,
Bruce Banner = Jesus: mild mannered, well-meaning peace-loving
Hulk = Yaweh (God): angry, ass-kicker -- seems to act without reason
Grey Hulk = Holy Ghost: rare appearances

shaggyback: I think Christians totally got Jesus' message wrong. Jesus never claimed to be god or even the messiah. He basically believed that, like his mentor John the Baptist, his mission was to pave the way for the messiah (who was on his way) by convincing people to renounce their sins. He was kinda like the Silver Surfer, a herald. The messiah was Galactus.

Oh man if that doesn't get me sent to hell nothing will.
Iraq Erections- I cant believe no one made fun of this
Oeming:When the Iraq dude spoke yesterday, he kept saying "erections" instead of "elections" Lines like "Iraq will hold its erections" had me dying. I think he was pulling a ba-ba-booie on the US.

Myxomatosis: Iraq had just better not hold their erections on national CBS or they'll be fined $550K.

Doopspeak: As for me, I'm definately thinking about Kerry for this erection.

shaggyback: The terrorists are doing all they can to make this erection harder and harder. But in the end it will explode in their faces.

Anil: Haven't you guys been reading? Only some parts might have erections. Unlike Florida which can't hold anything but a crooked erection.

NickThompson: Is Florida Bill Clinton's new secretary?
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